yet its so simple to realise
so easy to coordinate and i cant just believe how it suddenly struck me like it was breaking news
when I count how many blessings I have , when I think about how many actions I do without stress, without illness , or disruption - as once in a library I remember distinctly the words coming out of my mouth
'wow its really hard to be healthy'
after realising how many dramatic illnesses that can conquer a human being
and yet after understanding that I was precious
I was still stressed
and have continued to be
not stopping to believe for a moment how
blessed I fanatically am
when I look at all the times I waste and yet they just keep coming back - each time a further Golden moment in my life that possibly could be perfect if Ijust seized the day
Its funny how I stress to try remember how blessed I am
as if worry and poverty of mind are my only blessings
as If All I see is madness and chaos, fear and repetitions of failure - right now these are my only blessings
oh and wasting time and the inability to love God
I am a Hopeless monster who is a pathetic small thing not realising how many blessings she has to appreciate and so I deserve the ground of stress underneath me solid as If I was on a cross trainer but never sweating or losing an inch of devil..from me
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