Tuesday, October 8, 2013

light on my way

like a corrupt land , dirty streets line my eyes, people a mess in disguise, shattered and bruised with really no life, there is no happiness here , broken dreams ,and spilled hopes, no chances and expensive honesty, there is no honesty, there is no chance, life here is different than the rest of the world, changes are dim and magic is slim, the desert mixes with dirt to make lies, the water mixes with toilets to make drinking water, the water mixes with kidneys to kill, but that is not the only reason for death here, death to try , death to fantasise, death to have new things, death to think differently, death to be similiar to the rest of the world, is a sin here, there is no light, here there is no light

and yet
I dont close my eyes and press for sweet orange juice, here i was born, here i was raised, here i taught language, here I come from, here is my land, the one that made me , the one God chose for me - here is my country, I have been give ncolour, tradition and honour , been given its secrets and its scents, its food and its glory, its gardens and its colours, i have been given its r esponsibility to call it my home, here i am light will follow me , I will make it each and every day, here there is family, wonderful family, here there is love, cardemon tea, energy, here there is whispers of joy that can be a song, songs are beautiful along the river nile, waving and winding around the city, the city is the past at night, old and asleep with bedroom lights on, shadows in the twighlight, the stars look over us, and the moon glows, there is light in the darkness
the sun wakes each and every day, to dry the last pain away, and it works for people live here, and continue to be strong
de contaminated by heat, by fizzing rays that come coded with tommorow that no one can decode

here there is light of the sun that breaks the darkness and as long as i am here there will be no darkness in my heart for I start
a new life
and a new day
a mango new day
and it will taste divine and
sweet and yellow with truth and correctness and divinity to the one

No comments:

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -