Tuesday, October 22, 2013


Stop screaming inside your heard and learn thoese beautiful traits from the five Queens in Islam not laziness, from the devil
the most humble, advanced, models of life
Creative women, happy women, trustworthy women, oh kind women,
those women knew what they wanted and what they lived for and what they would die for
and what made them individual and what made them love and what made them
Queens for Allah's faith
oh imagine what it would be to be a woman that is sure of herself. knows she smart, knows shes doing the right things, knows she would never do the wrong things. imagine that woman who knows she wouldnt miss al fajr
because everytime she sleeps or worse wakes up but doesnt pray
its like tearing a piece of her humanity
but that is just a degrading level
imagine a woman who wakes for Fajr without delay
imagine a woman who wears modest for faith and not for anyone
just to keep her body safe
imagine a woman who doesnt have negativities geared towards herself
no she would never harm herself so
should would only pray, read Qu'ran and be magical in her soul
never obstructive to a worthy cause
only deserving of the expensive air she breathes

now imagine a woman who is in massive debt
for her life is perfect and yet she acts like she wants to return it
if you close your eyes
you can see the devils surround her
near her
playing with her
and beating her
the time
you can see their drool falling on her face as she snores through the dawn
you can smell their hazardous waste corrode her identity
you can feel their carved madness etched on her soul
you can not deny their collections around her
for shes already missing a prayer
late more than 24 hours
imagine how much debt that is

imagine a woman whos whole life is surrounded on focusing on others...

imagine a woman whos whole life is focused on finishing things in the last second

imagine a woman who life is dramaless yet the voice of drama fulfills her into blackness
just a void
is where she is contained


No comments:

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -