Saturday, September 1, 2012

Signed... the weakless

Ya allah seal my cracks
mend my holes
restore my being
before i fall
repair my time
alter my fate
change my heart
turn me back
so i am not late
for the future
Ya Allah heal my thoughts
treat my soul
treat the melody that has turned cold
put back power
build my ceiling higher
for I dream I can see past the small things
and I dream the sky is not my limit
and  I dream this hope never dies
without faith
and I dream I am amazing
at everything possible
and I dream he becomes a part of me
and I dream he is strong
and I dream its perfectly wrong
and I dream its luscious
and I dream its surreal
and I dream its magnified volume of love
and I dream its all mine
I am selfish Ya Allah
but I am not small
I am selfish Ya Allah
but I am not young no more
I am selfish Ya Allah
but I am not weak


Signed ....
the weakless

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -