Thursday, March 8, 2012

hope raises......


you may try to break me
you may even succeeed for a while
but you never break my margins so i always can fix to the way i was
reshape the woman I am and start again
you may try to end me
finish my game but I always find a new way to get back on track
you may make me feel down , you may offer me sorrow and i take it
but i will realise what is you are giving me and it will never be too late to return it
you may hover over my space but i will ignore you even if it takes me a while
you may do bad to me
but i will never be bad to anyone
and i will never be bad to myself
i am a
diva
and i
 deserve the
best
i
deserve
the best
because
i am
muslim
Diva
I am a powerful woman
a smart
woman
and a woman
who is faithful
and who is proud
well proud of what she is 


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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -