Wednesday, March 28, 2012

cmon now....think!

Tell me not to burn and I will only light in the fire of your eyes
your glimmering voice of dusken embankment on a paris fall

Tell me not to sink and I will happily drown in your words bay
falling through the verbs that make me whole and heavy with love

Tell me not have and I will only want to have it all , your all
holding the night away from darkness, pulling the light near my soul

Tell me not to say it, and I will only want to say that I love you
more than anything in this world, more than anything outside of this world

____________________
in strange places I try find you
this mesmerising piece of future
and yet i desperately search the past
for i would look anywhere and
i would go anywhere
if i knew where to go


______________
with a broken heart i walk to you
becasue I am damaged from the intensity of your invisibility
a part of me is strong and knows to wait
a part of me screams like a child
a child without their favourite toy

___________________

in imaginative continents i fly the earth for you
I beat all romance for you
I shine all heartbeats that desire
I flaw all stories
I break all mysteries
and I make all love rewritten
just for your touch

_______________
with a callless tonight
i think
if i believe you are somewhere
then i can think
what are you doing right now?

if i dont believe then
the historic nighttale continues........

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -