Wednesday, January 23, 2008


Dreams strangled
Hopes mangled
Fantasies tangled

Love parted
Distance charted
Hurt started

Weakness grazing
Promises dazing
Imagination ageing

Kisses breaking
Hearts aching
Lovers faking

Forever darkening
Fear larkening
Misery harkening

Loss beginning
Misunderstanding winning
Pain spinning

Hugs tearing
Never caring
After me – after all
I love the way you love me
I love the way you talk to me
I love the way I dream our future to be
I love the way I make you out to be
I love the way I need you
The way I ………………..
I hate the way I get so jealous
The way I can't stop thinking about you
The way I don’t understand, why I understand so much
I hate the way we are so far apart
I hate the betrayal of not having you near
I hate the regret of you not wiping my tears
I hate crying all the time about you
I love when I smile because of you
I hate to think what you think of me…………….
I hate to think how wrong it would be………

No comments:

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -