Door 8: timE to balance, time to remember the rest
I listen to what ive always wanted to do
its rejuvenating exciting
i am so happy finally
but when i turn there are still other prts of my life untouched
power cut
dark and tired
like before
its like i have taken all my energy and condensed it into this one thing
good
but not so great
what about faith?
what about reading?
what about the mind
what about everything else
my body is listening to me
everyday i feel a little part of me come back
as i lose pain and misery andweakness
words are no more sharp
i am getting stronger physically anf mentally
but i am still listening todevils
i am still not fully in control
i must be awareof thisfor
if you dont know the dangers you will falli nthem
balance is what you need
balance is what yourequire
you have awoken from a deep sleep but dont go to sleep in other areas and only stay awake here
dont what does god mean to you?
What it is...
I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.
My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-
My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.
But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.
Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...
Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -
It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -
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