Monday, March 11, 2013

you are my mirror

Inspired by Justin Timberlakes new song - mirror

I cant help but notice your reflection
in the mirror of my heart
I listen to music so we may never be apart
all these tunes remind me of who I want to become
and the little part of me that was - yet is so important
sitting here at 12.46 am in a blue kitchen
you join my future every second im alive  
I become threaded to you in a strange lyrical dimension
you just got to be strong
i dont want to lose you now
so i think
: what is it ive done wrong?
like give in to temptation?
no that was just pure sensation
I want to figure it out
how you were right here all along
and i didnt see you
how you were my reflection
and i couldnt look back
somehwere in your eyes
llife makes sense
and youre warm and full
im trying to breakthough
to you
and music is the only way
listen to this
show me how to fight you
and ill only be fighting myself
cuz its like youre my mirror

this house gives me memories
like waking up for school with 2 alarm bells
or having suhoor at ramadan
or studying for final year college in the conservatory
or praying in that corner behind the door
or putting speakers lying in my bed and just forgetting the world

I  remember how many times
I dreamt to fall in love
and to be loved
in all different ways my imagination rolled and strolled
until i couldnt control them
I never could control my feelings
escpecially if they were real and pure and honest
they become everything I am and I them

I wish I could stop the young me and tell her
be patient -  love is coming to you
better than you ever imagined
dont be sad here and cry at night
you will not live lonely
and you will not live afraid
dont feel you are ugly
for there will come a man that
will make you feel forever beautiful
dont have all this negativity
for God did create your other half
and did create the one who understands you
and wants you
and needs you
the one you wont be able to live without
just like you desire
and maybe higher

she wouldnt have believed me............


Anonymous said...

Really what you are writing is amazing .. I feel it ..I live with it ...Even i I can touch the words with my soul .. Really what you are writing is making my days ..
I don't want to stop reading ..
I just don't want to ..
Deep in my heart ... So deep .. Your words built its own place ... A place that all of your happiness and sadness can stay there forever ..

Your secret admire

Sudan Fairytale said...

thank you thats very meaningful and i really liked your comment

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -