Monday, February 22, 2016

M&A 18

Yesterday, I was reminded how I love you so much
How I love being with you
and how you are always there for me and i am always there for you
yesterday i was reminded how you attract me like light to roots
I need you to grow
you attract me like opposite magnets just
unable to be anywhere else but stuck together
you attract me like a flickering light in all darkness
you attract me like that single glance amongst a crowd
you attract me even like a robber is attracted to money
you even attract me like how a president is to their throne
unable to get up from your love

I felt in a fantasy
i still feel in a fantasy
that you are in my world

and i am proud of you and I
I want to tell you that I am proud of who you help me become and i just hope that you are proud being with me

I love dancing when i am with you
alone or together i love dancing for you flick inside me all those tunes harmonising in my cells and reminding me that there is only the tune of love

I love eating with you
for  food tastes like heaven
and each particle makes a story
and each story becomes a memory
of things we love and things ...we dont
its all together
you and I

I love you driving me to work everyday
for its like the mending of day before it starts
and the erasing of bad things before they happen
and its like the immunity against all odd , because we are even


I love you being there for me
when i cry
when i fall
when i need help
when im scared
and when im depressed
thinking that its all over
you remind me its just the beginning to a journey that is nearing our results

with you, i am close to my aims
to my goals
to my kindness, that sometimes flies aways
but your are my wings to collect that kindness again
with you, i am happy, no, i am ecstatic
with you , i am new , and refereshed
like the fresh shower in the morning
or the fresh orange juice in the evening
or the nice walk at mid afternoon


everything is fun with you


...to be continued

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -