Monday, November 4, 2013

Tommorow ..is the new year

Sort of like a hidden contest that I could win
a secretive door that  Icould open
that nobody knows but me
for suddenly instead of being given one chance to try again I have another chance
1435
its funny how when you think that its 2013 but its reall 1435
and that means that we really are in the old ages
we are the ancestors and we are the ones to be written in history
we are history
when its 2013 in true time and true date
where will muslims be?
where will Sudan be?
where will I  be?

all very hard questions
all questions I cannot answer
all giving me an image that really there is nothing more important but to remember faith and God


so why then have you stopped raising the alarm? and why have you stopped waking up
its not that early you know
...
1435....
I hope God makes it happy and I make it worthwhile


ameeen

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -