Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Marylin in Hope (5)

Pretty Lady
her eyes dance with flavor
and her skin melts with pain
I wonder have I taken my life in vain
all those young heartbeats 
 just cruising in the mess
I dont know why im not up to the test
of time.... 
Sweet Lady
what are you thinking of?
and what do you want?
why do you imagine a woman so heavy
with nothing
and why can you never feel that burning woman
inside you
you always write waiting
just waiting
just dying to come out
as if one day you find the key
and open and let her out
the woman inside you
I know
but have you ever considered
the door is open
and the key has already done its job
and that girl is still inside
unlocked
but not yet free

.....
 

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -