Monday, April 18, 2011

Cherry blossoms 3

Life will only blossom within me If I understand what is life to me. I will not eat or drink, Sleep or succumb no more until I figure out... What is life to me ...for life is precious - it is not facebook, it is not buses, and moeny, it is not holidays, it is not programmes or made up love storys it is not chocolate... it is not even perfume or sleep - no Life is non of those - for I have lived all of these and have not passionately admired life ...yet
(to be continud)


Deep down these little flowers all mean one thing to me


Beauty


Beauty of Life
Beauty of destiny
Beauty of What you want and how you think of yourself
Beauty of hope
Beauty in the day
the sun
the sunset
the night
Beauty in God

God is beautiful and loves beauty’
God’s very essence is beautiful.
it's utterly and ravishingly beautiful
it cannot be compared with anything else
God’s beauty within each of us
shines all that we do
it is God’s beauty that attempts to draw life
 it is the reflection of beauty within us that attracts us to God
How do we become beautiful for God,
amidst the ugliness of our own souls? 
How do we respond to God's enchantment
, in our days and in our nights,
in our realities and in our dreams

Everything is beautiful when i think of GOd
After i pray
When i pray
when I read Quran
When I hear Quran
Suddenly things fall into place again
Who Am i?
I am hope
Why am I here?
To worship God
Where am I going?
To heaven
What Is love to me?
If God lets me

.................................

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -