Wednesday, October 31, 2007

The challenge

sitting at opposite sides of the table of life, the devil pulls out a chair on one side and the soul on the other. It is a meeting of truth, kingship or slavery, hope or misery as a result. Paper’s of thoughts, opinions, influences, actions, words and views are tossed and thrown. Will the darkness of the devil be the president of the deciding house or will the golden illumination of light from the window of the soul be the savior of the entry.They argue and defend, shout and command, interfere and interrupt, stop and shake heads, fight and slam fists, either win or fight. The table of non – digressing stress solidly separates them but yet closes any aperture that could ever be between them. They are drawn by the destined challenge; what the devil set out to do and what the soul was made to resist.

The devils cleverness; outstanding stunts continue their slyness to overpower. It is an armored mission, challenge to make the gullible soul to fail inadvertently; Outcast the Almighty’s kindness and offer cruelty and weak gratitude. Expatriate the good, exchange with a troubled neighborhood of wrong, wrong doing, continuation of it. To convict in the belief that it is difficult and useless to return to the right path, to become resplendent once more. This is what the devil was set out to do for eternity in the galaxy of the souls meaning. Sit on that side of the table and wild out; furiously inflict hesitation, lack of trust and extinct gratification, creating obstruction, and havoc to the soul. The devil doesn’t know any better, any less, banished to this seat until forever.

The opponent that is the soul knows better. It was given a choice to choose, respect from its creator, the choice to choose, the ability to refute what the devil wants signed or to accept the dark contract of business. It is a challenge, the former, a never ending perseverance for the soul so it can remain refulgent. It is an ever lasting sweat on the forehead from the dripping effort to become stronger than the devil and it can get so hard.

It is the challenge; the soul to refuse and remain on a diamond’s journey and not in a buried tunnel after the meeting.

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -