Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Papers from Sudan 2 _Reminiscing Sudanairways



I used to remember the delight and excite inside me when the realms of sudan airways began to near - as I skipped to read its name on the screen and shout to my mum
ITS THIS WAY!
I remember the beautiful feeling that sudan has extended its arms out to get you and bring you home
for once you even just hear sudan airways - you begin to feel you are home
from the blue and yellow colours to the chatting of travelling women meeting for the first time but talking as if they know each other forever and the screams of crying children and eavy handbags
and pure disorganisation
I was still...
ecstatic

I remember the delays that became so normal it wasnt even anger or rage when you were informed
I remember the taking off and the prayer said for protection to guard us along this safe flight

I did feel safe


I remember the joy of seeing the first signs of sudanese land from the sky
the desert the different colours the different methods of life , true life exploded from the small plane window into my heart
for I always have the window seat!
I remember the rummage of luggage and pushing to get out and laughter and eschange of addresses and then...

heat
and sun
and my eyes connected with its own eyes
the heat was a natural antiseptic from the past travels
the heat was a natural shock of making you alive
the heat was a purity against my frozen being
for in that split second the heat reminds me that I am here and I am a part of this land
born here , no matter where I go the heat is what surrounds me


the article was about a man's experience and love for Sudan airways
I never knew we were allowed 46 kilos of luggage !
but I do know Sudan airways was slowly destroyed until extinction making Sudan one of the minority of countries NOT to have its own airline internationally

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -