Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Good song ...

strangely .. i have no idea what song i wrote this for ...


remains to be a mystery

Love the feeling when you catch up on a good song
but life isnt always fulfilled you forget
that someone is asking for your help
telling you and telling you that they need you
and what do you do
pretend its ok
pretend its nothing
until it blows up

its a really good feeling to hear a song that you just heard for the second time
every one of us hears a song for the first time

but I also forget people that need me and care about me
cuz of my unfair laziness

I used to be lazy
now im lazy and mean
and unproven
im stuck

its a really nice feeling when you click on a song you know it will be good
remind you of a city lighted and a video on Mtv while life creates new memories
the cold breathing around you and yet you are heated to the core through....with faith
and entity
a song that compares strength with that romantic sensuality
elegance but sexiness at the same time
movement in rythym like walking without falling
spells of music make you fall into place

but you forget someone
something
somehow that is more important
you forget a lot of things
and thus your realm is weak
ready to falll apart
ready to break open
and flood with badness

lets face it.............you are a bad woman

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -