Monday, December 7, 2015

Dear hope,

The time has gone and you are still unfair to yourself
your time unmanaged
your body unfixed
and your heart ... unmended
you are still unable to comprehend the beauty of a cold silent day
like now
just yourself
and most miserably
you are unable to feel the delicacy of taking a big and wise decision

digging out your 24 hours from the rubbish bin
or picking up your fallen brain cells from the ground
understanding the truth within you
becoming someone you can be proud of

for the clicks of this fading laptop
make it a newly coming memory
tomorow you may pick up a new thing
a new piece of you
and when you take it home
what will it think of you?
what will it hope for you
and will it be filled with?

wishful thinking ?
will you disappoint ?
as usual

I urge you to sit in this beautiful silence and just think

just ....think

No comments:

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -