Wednesday, April 25, 2012

a detour

A line of magic, a new portal of difference, a road with different journey
even if today
you always have two choices to make
and if u think for a second more or try a minute harder
you can change your life
because the things you hear, the images you see the way your mind is affected
can drastically change everything
the key is strength
and the want to want something different

 i love to write poetry
or words
i feel like i really did love to write poetry
and that i deserve a new chance to write
better
stronger

I feel like a new window i opened
an old door i closed
a new gate i unlocked
and i am
i am
walking away

 no more compromises
no more weak strategies

 walking away
and ill never stay
in a broken day

no more running
no more chasing an evil fantasy
no more surrendering
no more acclimitising

i refuse to be driven away
from the true things i love
from the dreams
the good ones

I am not like everyone else
I am hope
and i love it

its time to get a good vibe
no more pulling up at red lights
just green
and a brave pedal

cinnamon queen
and african queen
modern queen
and smart queen
lucky queen
diva queen
faithful queen
and certainly not a drama queen
and this is how i will do it
from now on


the stronger i get
its like flavour comes back into my pores
and life flows back in my veins
and love springs back into my bounce
and the angels can reenter my home
and my heart

two souls entwined in the blink of an eye
its that simple
and only then will i turn to you

if i day dream about you
then it must feel right
otherwise its not special
or diffrential from lacking

i cant deny the way im feeling
overjoyed that i took a detour
and it feels like a true dream
a beautiful reality
and all thats on my mind and all that im thinking is
what can i do to make it last as long as possible

i starting to link future motorways
with todays highways








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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -