Thursday, November 1, 2007


I wish one chance
So I could show you all my hidden romance
But more so -if I could just tell you
That I want what’s best for you-

Be the representative of your vivid faith
Stand as a believer of what is true and right
Tackle and endure to protect and secure
Use your power and energy
Feel the want to save your community
Burn with need to help in a tragedy
Contain urge - to bring your religion to prosperity

Love and cherish your duty

I see you pray and then read his letters
The soldier of purity, the shade from all misery

You would be nectar of my soul
An honourable man deserving uncountable praise
Light of the suns rays, warmth in my days
My ruler, I would follow blindly any of your ways
Because I would love who you are and what you do
And I would see in you that you are an ambassador of your proud Lord

But wait a second you will never be near
So I just want you to have fear
From the judgement day
I wish you would remember the after- life
Take it as friendly advice
From a person who doesn’t ever want to see you get hurt
She wants your name clean from every speckle of dirt
She wants you to be safe
She craves your happiness in the eternity
She dreams it in her fantasy
That you are fine and healthy forever

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -