Sunday, November 18, 2007

Different

If we were
In different places
With different imaginations
Other inspirations
Turns and deviations
Would it be too strange a combination?
Walking along different paths
Holding keys that open strange doors
Would love between us never soar?
Too different to communicate
Too hard to appreciate
What it is we mean
Acting in different scenes
Our ideas too bizarre to blend
Our opinions too different to send
To each other
Broken from one another
By different states of mind
Different reasons leave us find
Your pain is mundane
Inaccessible to the lover in me
My eyes are insane
They can only explain
How different you are
Our words are crazy
Twisted and lazy
Into a difference neither of us can understand
Melting letters in the sand
From a far away stranger
I write a difference that washes away
In a heart that will never say
That difference is existence
Difference is familiarity of life
But to us,
Different is abandonment
Different is discouragement
Our souls can never meet
Without emptiness beneath our feet
And trepidations to walk upon
Our difference is a weapon
Armed and ready to launch

In a different night
Where the same stars shine
I ask to look into your eyes
And see something I believe
Someone I trust
And a promise to achieve
But in the dusty glazed sky
All I see is the weak reflections of my love to you
All I feel is the broken world of my dreams
Flying high to get away from the pain
The darkness beckons to rain
A dry reason why we should be together
Drowning in the river of my thoughts
I beg your soul for an answer
To cheat me through this cranky game
But you and I are not the same
And I can't language your foreign attitude to life
So I can't translate my fantasies to you
They all jam behind my miniscule voice
And clog to be sucked up by silence
Vacuumed to be lost forever
Because we are different - Forever

No comments:

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -