Sunday, June 22, 2014

a stealer 1

imagine a stealer of your piece of mind and truth, your honesty and your kindness
imagine a stealer of your time, of your hard work , your every bit of troubles and seat
or cold....
imagine a stealer of your wisdom, your travels and your life, your dreams that you worked hard to create
imagine a stealer.....


All of me has been stolen but I want to write about a picture that stole my peace
a piece of me ripped from pain

from fragility of wanting to scream and scream
but knowing I cant
imagine.... a picture stealing your every piece of peace

 I wonder
how its done , doing something so evil and believing it isnt
making it right
not feeling the damage youve caused or the pain youve erupted

I wonder how it feels to live on the other side
isnt that what he thought>?
I am sure - daggers flying in his mind
he only wanted one thing
to be more like him
jealousy is a creative art
a malicious equipment high class

all from the devils cut
a film out of holywood
its yours to have
for you deserve
isnt that what he thought

I hate who i am
i hate what i am
i hate that i cant control any of me
i hate that i dont care anymore
i hate that i dont look good
i hate that i am lazy
and weak
i hate that im angry
i hate that im faithless

but i know i could never steal.....


could I?

havnt i stolen my goodness and sold it off
havnt i stolen my innocence
my pride
havnt i let my grandness be stolen

sometimes I wish i was that spotty teenager

sometimes i wish i could scream the truth
for i know people who have truly stolen
and i hate it
and hate me for being the weak one
my family

but lets forget those things for a while/////

what is become of yoU>
are you even there
are you disintegrated
are you even there?

No comments:

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -