Thorn mornings

AAnd thrn i realised how it was suddenly all my fault

For i had been going on the plan they had been making out for me

And i had been travelling on the road taken easily

Here i am a strong minded woman wanting to become soemthing if myself in the world of men

With the extra weight and all

With the extra hate and all

But i was part of the hate

And it was making me late

And i thought that there was enough kindness in the room to dissipate my anger in the mornings

As my devils were still sleeping

But suddenly i realised there can only be so much love before it shrivels up 

As i was asleep when it should have been watered

And i was wrong when i should have been right

And i was weak when i should have been strong

And i was upset when i should have been smiling

And i was gearing my cells to the wrong wavelength

Things should be getting done 

Things should be here on my lap

Not on theirs

Things should be near not far

Things should be happening

Good things

And i wonder

How many thorn mornings will i have to endure

Strangely our little angel is with us

But i realise our devils are just too great 

So here we are 

All apart

And all together pricking each other

And am scared from these itches were inflicting 

And these pains were deepening

And these moments were changing

And these traumas were suffering 

Easily and slowly

Its like the isis of love has come upon us 

And little upon little am scared of a disaster

For there are too many thorns on his skin

And there is only so many words that can be spoken as balsam

Thorn mornings... what is your medicine?

Must i pick out each one

Your pricking my family and my heart

Must i detox

Or become an amjad lover

Or be like my grandmother

An absorption of sponge love

And baring torment

Must i change the room

Or maybe the hours

Or maybe the clock 

Thorn morning- please go away and never come back another day

Leave me and my family alone

We want to drive together when the day starts and love each other and laugh and be merry

But because of you - we are not happy

And earthquakes are opening our base

We are falling

Thorn mornings

I will fight you

Until i change you 

First

No more salt

Second 

Lots of faith

Third

A dream of love

Fourth 

A wave of independance