Sunday, January 24, 2016

The suprising girl

Its so strange
This smart girl
Talented smart even flirty and yet
The black consumes her
I cant understand why
Why couldnt she be white or even grey
Why black and just making me wonder
What the hell does she look like 
Should i ask? To see her
Should i ask her why is that part of your brainnot smart like the rest of u
Or isit me
Im too open
Too stupid to realise and accept 
Maybe cuz she doesnt have to worry what pple think of her
It up to them to imagine
Not up her to help them
I can just guess the relief of no uses to anythinno makeup no perfume no nice headacarfs no nice clothes
No nothing
Just black
And then i wonder of he did like her
What it would be
Would it be not applicable
Or a womens all wedding
Hes too cool for that 
With too many friends
But they flirt! 
Why is she talkative and pictures herself and even a selfie!
Now thishas to stop
For The mind cannot understand
Its either black or nothing
Or no black with everything 

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -