I hate who I am sometimes
nothing to the grand horse high in the field looking at the sky
nothing to princesses and queens
the royal gala of impressions and the I will not do this
because its not me
no
me i do and then tihnk later
me I say and scream and never listen
me I say and never act
just play solitair
i never pray on time
i never even thank
the one above who GAVE me
all this kindness
i
am
so
messed
uo
who am I to decide?
to say what is right?
or wrong?
who am I to believe I know?
to say I am strong or that I am not wrong
who am i to fight the worthless
or am i the worthless that i am fighting
UUGGGHHHH
I hate how i do sometimes
just rolling in life as if all i know is stable
nothing is right
and nothing is wrong
and nothing is certainly stable
you may be the one eating dates for a celbration
talking like you got it all and fishing in other peoples
celebrations
cuz you got it all
!"£$%^& loser
I hate what i say sometimes
how can i just
wake up one say and become
someone else/// or rather
become the me i want to become
kinder
better
queiter
easier
happier
god i am not happy
because i am too busy fishing in other peoples business
i dont even look at my own problems
that i keep eating
why dont i like someone else to talk to me about them
huh?
SHUT UP and DONT get in my business
but IIIII MEEEE can get in others EASSSILLY
and expect to be right
UUGGGHHHHH
I hate who I am
and I hate who ive become
I dont know who I am anymore
and thus writing anything is like getting water out of stone
i miss my blog and my writing
and praying subuh on time
and eating right
and loving
and watching TV
and reading books
and having cardemon tea at 6am
and thinking of my future and ways of love and happiness
rather than
SCREAMIN
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