Sunday, June 21, 2015

Ramadan day 4...احمدك واشكرك يا رب

Thank you allah
Forbetween seconds that can shift plates and change lives you keep me safe
Happy and u keep the ones around me close and happy and safe
For they are my family
And i need them so much
Ya allah for everything near and far 
I thank you for being there for me
Never letting me go
Protecting me
Andi know
Everything happens for a reason
But all yourreasons are healthy and happy
Ya allah imsoryy for everything ive done
And havnt done
And im sorry for being sore
Being mean
Being lost
Ya allah thnk u for everything
For every littlething
That i have feom hairpins to breaths
That i take
To planesthat i ride to nice dresses that i csn wear to that clean mri
To myfamily
To him
Thank you to mylife
Every single bit of it
Thank you ya rab

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -