No electricity - shouldnt have cut but here I am in a Khartoum afternoon/ late afternoon amidst a silence I actually enjoy
I hate to admit but today is one of those days I deep inside actually like when that the electricity cuts - a peaceful existence of time and space where you can do nothing but actually look right inside your soul for you can see nothing , hear nothing , be nothing but you
I turn on my lap top and read 64% remaining - I am suddenly taken aback at the short energy we have
just like my laptop i have a stop sign to me
a baattery that will run out one day
maybe sooner maybe later
am ashamed instantly at who I am
like a woman fragmented into a million pieces
like all the pieces of dust around me just flying helplessly into the air
thats how I feel
where is my love for who I am
where is my need for Allah
where is my joy for religion
where is my strength for health
I feel like that grip i used to demand i own is forcefully going or gone
I feel like that rope i always used to hold has slipped
I feel like im just circling really dizzy
and I ask myself
isnt your life like this laptop battery
ar you not racing against time in life just like you are racing with time to finish work and do a lot before it cuts
isnt Allah in charge of how much time you have? can you do anything about that?
can you do anything about the cut electricity
must you not wait for it to come without a singly type of control? and the only control you have is doing as much work as possible
same as in life the only control you have is being the best you can be using the time you have being the nicest you can be , the happiest, the kindest, and the most pure
i feel like my life has all been set into a small example
like in science or maths
to the power of.... life is a laptop battery
.................
trust me the problem is within you
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