Monday, December 18, 2023

After the course

 As if my life will stop being busy 

Will stop being hard

Will stop being lonely

But it’s easy to play the business card


All your troubles are in your hand 

And this is exactly what you deserve 

You complain to anyone but allah 

And the pain you cannot swerve 


Expect people to say 

What you do not want to hear 

Expect people to analyse 

In a way to suit their own 

It’s detrimental I believe

If you still want

To achieve


Hey hope 

You’re broken into a million pieces and you’ve taken down the rest

It’s been hard so what but allah chose you 

Except he didn’t expect you to say into darkness 

Stop this 

Madness

Mrs hard worker 

What’s your business not having business with allah 

Are you mad 

Or just bad 

Or turning into a monster looking like a mum 

Hey Mrs horrible human being 

Have you ever complained to someone and their words healed you ?

Hell no 

So hey you keep doing it ? 

After the course ? Will you stop?  Hey Mrs kind heart with evil words 

Have you ever thought to just stop ? 

BMW 

Stands for 

Best mother working 

Or 

Broken mad woman 

It’s the way you see things 


Hard to decipher how to go back 

But my advice is stop just stop 

No comments:

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -