Dear God
please let me have the best connection i could ever have with my daughter
i ask you that this connection grows and never falters and strengthens and never wilts
its really painful to lose connection with someone you love dearly
very frustrating and like the stop sign of your movement
this morning i received good news
only to be stopped signed by the ironing and torn tissues
you see its not seen what i do
it doesnt matter
it never reaches the heart
the disconnection is so real it makes me want to anguish in the predicted anger
shes always angry at me
shes always distrusting of me
shes always non believing in me
shes always out of love
with me
shes fine with others
she can conversate and laugh and ask and wonder and joke
but with me
shes always angry
and i find pain in knowing i am so similar to her and yet so enstranged from her
and that i will always love her and dont want to judge her but she
does judge me - severely
in fact her judgement is now so mountainous that my shoulders bleed
i hate ironing
thats all
and i think that being cool with kids is sometimes easy on the mind for both sides but discipline is also a part of me -
i also really like my work and like the person I am when i work but then the dishes are never done from her perspective and so im a complete failure
but then
i must remember that her obstacles, other women have been employed with and her anger towards me is reasonable
our passions are just not the same
her role is also finished and mine has started but the merging is wrong between us
generation opposites and tradition v modernity can sometimes play with fire
she thinks and i think
i feel and she feels
im tired and shes tired
so there no room for understanding
please let me have the best connection i could ever have with my daughter
i ask you that this connection grows and never falters and strengthens and never wilts
its really painful to lose connection with someone you love dearly
very frustrating and like the stop sign of your movement
this morning i received good news
only to be stopped signed by the ironing and torn tissues
you see its not seen what i do
it doesnt matter
it never reaches the heart
the disconnection is so real it makes me want to anguish in the predicted anger
shes always angry at me
shes always distrusting of me
shes always non believing in me
shes always out of love
with me
shes fine with others
she can conversate and laugh and ask and wonder and joke
but with me
shes always angry
and i find pain in knowing i am so similar to her and yet so enstranged from her
and that i will always love her and dont want to judge her but she
does judge me - severely
in fact her judgement is now so mountainous that my shoulders bleed
i hate ironing
thats all
and i think that being cool with kids is sometimes easy on the mind for both sides but discipline is also a part of me -
i also really like my work and like the person I am when i work but then the dishes are never done from her perspective and so im a complete failure
but then
i must remember that her obstacles, other women have been employed with and her anger towards me is reasonable
our passions are just not the same
her role is also finished and mine has started but the merging is wrong between us
generation opposites and tradition v modernity can sometimes play with fire
she thinks and i think
i feel and she feels
im tired and shes tired
so there no room for understanding
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