Friday, January 1, 2010

I...must say sorry


I scrape to escape with my fingernails the sound of my frustrations

my insides scream for a resolution that I know I just will not find

not now

but my mind acts stubbornly to carress my deepest fears

my heart attempts blindly to recover the insanity of future proposals

details integrate into disintegrated pain

I am looking over my shoulder and over the stars for this

I am looking about my life and into the clouds to see

fog

white smoke natural sets into my neighbour hood

whisking me with romantic embedded cold

I am

frozen

with minus 6 degress of new year questions

with

anxiety

with...Love

this is int love

this is ...unknown

untitled

strange

I've been

strange

I've been cunningly beautiful

I've been plaited with dreams

each strand .....

getting it wrong
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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Amazing as always

January 4, 2010 at 6:56 AM

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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -