Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Echoes in my mind_ (The Contradictions of similiarity)








Falling stars cutting the darkness and entering into a whispy night of dreams and mysteries shining through eyelids demanding peace ,yet only funding trouble from the deep dark soul that profits from money of a tormented plight.


Feeling awake while asleep, numb while conscious


I wonder where is my place,

Where is the emotion in anothers face,

Are they for me or against me,

I feel like they are destroying me.


Sweet dictatorship with misery I blend


The sounds of my memories momantarily gush through me and unlock all the reserved energy of goodness, I am blinded by the viscious passion that soars in me as poison and beauty become one. As perfume and rubbish devour each others defintions and Hell and Heaven are stirred into the complexity of identical apparitions.


Painted black with white paint.


Complex rythms raining on my soul

the waters of my dreams soak me as I fall

Deep down somewhere in the drains collecting my identity

I'm broken into pieces to fit into different pipes of mystery

Each part of me alone, wondering where is the good end that I can reach

In the pitch black hole of the night

As taxis and trafiic lights fight

and the rains of light pool onto streets that are stalling memories and time


Love seeps with intensity in my mind

But the urge to escape from this backstreet defined

I Don't forget that I am undermined

By a mind that wants to find

Something that is ugly but kind

No comments:

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -