Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Eyes Have been so Blind


My eyes have been so blind

I've been in darkness, trying to figure out why I stumble

Falling , hurting, crying, not understanding

My eyes have been so blind

Shedding their youth away

into misery sights and foreplay of disaster

I was sick with a sheet of upset tears

All the time

My eyes have been so blind


And then

God... He shows me people to learn from

he gives me days to think freely

He lets me live with independance

He pushes me to never give in

and I look at the light reflecting my glass shadows

everything is right before me

To take, to fix, to learn

Everything is there

To clean, to know, to be

All I have to do

Is remember

That my eyes have been so blind

and I must switch the intensity of that time

OFF


I must not be sleepy lazy or tired
From fixing my eyes
I must not be betrayed
by what I've seen so far
- NOTHING
I must let my eyes become stronger
fitter
happier
determined as ever

No comments:

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -