What have u decided?

Push me grab me prod and look

Intrude sick intrude bad intrude weird intrude 

Allthe way in all the way out

Think wrong think things

Fun now turned addict

Try thistry that new things

Dont write that 

Look good feel shit

Try to be normal

The lava has burnt 

Actually ive passed the test of accepting the pain 

I want things

I need things 

Cant have them 

Write them

Maybe

Theyll never be good like in my mind

No confidence no goodness i dont want to be here

Or there

Or anywher

Nothing is making me happy

Nothing is making me stop

Maybe midlife crisis

There i just let out my age

Deprived

I am deprived now of all religion

Of all love for myself

Of all calmness

I am  sick

Officially

Officially oficially

Sick

No treatment though 

Sd like sweet dreams or standard deviation

But this isnt standard

Its more like

Off course severed

Could be sin days ot sexually deprived

Or depleted

Or sudden disaster

Or sick days

Or shit drama