Tuesday, September 20, 2022

The difference

 Is that during work hours the African watches tv or opens Facebook while the non African concentrates

The non African works hard and tries harder focuses while the African laughs and gargles waste of time

It annoys me how in the queue only the African stopped domineeringly more than his non African humans . It annoys me how they concentrate on the past like 

These people should apologise for all they’ve done to us ! And it’s never like - what’s done is done move on! 

These people have done nothing to you compared to what you’ve done to yourself ! 

I am African 

But I am not focused

And that angers me

It suddenly dawned on me that I am like my African peers 

Constantly untrying and constantly blaming 

If I don’t find anyone to blame, I blame myself

It’s deeply annoying that perfection should exist outside me

That turmoil has a space in me 

And the Africans are the same

Lost in history never making a future 

Like me 


(This is A very stereotypical piece of work ) please don’t let it offend you ) it is meant as a piece of personal work to reflect on my own disadvantaged actions based on narrow observations . Clearly there are African who are superb ) I aspire to be one of those 




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What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -