the bigger picture - the better woman- Day 12

Number 44
Please dont give up and say you are beaten
remember you are better
you just dont know how to show it
you are kinder
you just dont know how to give it
you are wiser
you just forget in the midst of trouble or fury
please dont be angry
anger is never the correct method to proceed
remember what you want
but you must work
and stop feeling jealous
for I dont understand
it is she that must be jealous of you
a beautfiul young passionate
faithful
forgiven
smart
healthy
woman

dont lie to yourself
but dont lie to yourself
dont be so hard on yourself
but dont let go of all the reigns
dont be so soft
but be tamed and light and sweet
liek a cool breeze in the desert
or the most beautiful flower in the world
or the kindest smile on earth
or tbe best voice for this faith
dont be rough and sharp around the edges
smoothen yourself
and smoothen your heart think about what it is you want
Omar Ibn alKhattab
sae the bigger picture
have you?

Ramadan beaten at day 12

i am the circle of attention
and i hate it

i am also the square of laziness and confusion
and drama
and i loate it

yesterday i thought
i ama new woman
better
stronger kinder
but really what have i done to do this

nothing

i am the triangle of depsair
always in angles unable to get out of
always broken
never have i stressed myself to be stronger
so i dont find myself in a situation
i hate

I am tired
i am really tired
and i am sad that i have to take advice from a beautiful girl
who is frankly truly and honestly
better than me

wiser than me

happier than me
imagine she talks to the man of her dreams
about me

what should I do she says?
he kindly as he hugs her to sleep or maybe having dinner or while cuddling in tv says
no dont tell her
you stay out of it my dear

she listens to him
and does exactly as he says

 

education education

Education education
the key to life
the master of all good
 education education
from mudded houses to vast complexes
education education
all one aim to better
to achieve higher
to learn new things constantly
new things new things
imagine if everything new you learnt you got a gold medal
how many gold medals would you have ?
one?
teo?
none?
a 100?
a million?

education education
the simple but very hard strain on life
the wonderful and magnificent gier but in return wants your attention your time your effort
your devotion and only then will it guve you success
and moeny
and happinness
education education
time time
is short
power power lays unturned
Hope lays still

education is the key

Falling to be one of the old
to be one of the new
to learn new things
and to become a new woman
falling to love power and grace
together
omar ibn alkhattab
is my heart and soul
a man of truth and honesty
bravery and kindness
love and faith
i would have felt safe in this world if a man like that was in our world
in our whole world
it would have been right
it would have been just
it would have been worth living for a dream like that
to have men for islam
good islam
the right islam

I wish upon men like omar ibn alkhattab now
not the ones with sexy bodies or expensive cars
i wish upon the men like omar ibn alkhattab now
not the ones who flirt nice and who know a some cool slang

I wish upon men like omar ibn alkhattab
a real man
a true man
an amazing an successful man

i wish upon education
and happinness or Muslims like he did 

Day 11 - how can i be so ugly

How can I suddenly die like this
falter like this
fall like this
break like this
feel misery like this
in these wonderful days
how can i succumb like this
surrender like this
feel sorry like this
feel down like this
be weak like this
in these amazing days
how can I be lost like this
non beliveing like this
non understanding like ths
non blooming likethis
jealous like this

in these beautfiul days
how can i be so ugly?

so choose day 10 - the start ofthe secon third

I need to be better I ask myself
can i really be two people at the same time
I ask myself
can i really want to things at the same time

i cannot
it cannot be
my mind is alwaystorn
my heart is always exhausted
my soul is always mad
my body is always confused

I cannot be both women
the one who loves god and faith and wants to be simple and pure ,smart honest and gives her time truly to A heaven

and the one who is naughty and has wild dreams and crazy ideas and is jealous, lazy, stubborn, short tempered and wastes her time in pathetic desires-----
I cannot

BE BOTH

SO CHOOSE


what woman do you want to be not just in ramadan but in life
what woman do yo uwant to be
do you really think you deserve these big honest changes good dreams like this?
do you really think you can do both
you have to change hope
your sentiments and joys must change
your smiles must advance
your emotions must strenghten
your meaning must be rediscovered


everything in you
must flower and bloom
like a rose in the desert
a message in the sea found
a stolen gold retrieved
a melting land in the middle of the ice

everything inside you frozen must thaw
and all that was stolen must berestored
and messages once lost must be told
and rose isolated must remain in bloom and never stop believing

Day 10 - confused instead of peacefull in every cell

Day 10
I am confused
messed up in my thoughts
my heart and soul and mind and body are each in a different place
and yet i want to be one girl can i?

 no way
ill just end up with a broken life

i must bring t hem all together
i know my faith is the only thing that will definiteyl do that

nothing else can intervene
i want oter thhings yes
sometimes my inner self beats and i dream
of doing wrong things
of chasing things in this world
and then i think of the other side
the calm peaceful confident knowingful girl
and i get embarrased i cant do the best in here or there
my work s hsattered
my heart is bruised
my soul feels guilty all the time
my ears hurt
my eyes are trying to mend
and my body is tryinh to look good

i am in too many pieces
cant u see?

a sentence im off
a scene and im gone
a story and im lost
a song and im in love

its all wrong

hope dance for you
live like ur gona die tomoro but also that your gona live forever
be happy dont let thesechains bring you down
you want so many things
you can have htem all
you never know
do you/
?
but dont let the bad side of you get you down