My head is not in the right place
Ive looked for peace within me
Ive found some
But i still have a huge gaping hole
Am wondering 2 weeks left to the end
Why have i missed allah so much
Why have i forgotten his importance
Why have i left him behind
Why am i so cruel to him?
Forgetting it is that I need him, and not that he needs me
My relationship is very very cold
And yet he brought me here for a reason
I hate how i have replaced allah with all my affection
But the truth is
I am wilting away
And then when a challenge comes along
I am back to being naive
Whatever happened to being a muslim
Just living that truth
Not just an appearance
Not just a name
An actual feeling
Whatever happened to feelings for faith
Letting in its rays like the sun im sitting in now
Attention
Life is at its best
I am ready to be healthy
But not with this incomplete heart
Not with this emptiness
Yes
I have changed and i am better towards myself
I do
Like exercise
I used to hate moving my body
But now i like it
I used to hate eating healthy
Im not perfect but i dont like eating unhealthy anymore
The times i have ate unhealthy ive hated it
And when i did enjoy it i enjoyed it with a passion
I used to always bring myself down
when i ate anything
But now i dont
I love what i eat
And when i go wrong
Im still learning
Im learning when i eat i enjoy
And when i move i enjoy
But where is faith?
when there is no faith , how can i enjoy?
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