I never usually 21

I've wasted 3

I've wasted 3

and it feels like 300

tonnes on my heart

breaking into pieces because im not yet strong enough to hold on without a receipt

and it should be too

for going back is not an option now

i must focus

i must consider

that i am alone in this

I am very along in this

no texts, no phones, no smiles, no fakeness, no hidden attributes of a stolen moment in time

a stolen golden of rhyme

no one else

just I

I wanted...

I wanted so many things

cluttered in my mind

I couldnt choose from any of them

but now all i want is

to change

and i never usually change

so i must change

I

am

not wasting more

ever

for people judge you

and use you

and forget you

for people laugh at you

and put their concepts in your page

write on you

scribble their attitude

highlight your pain

for people take you..for granted

before they even know your feelings

who you are?

No.

I understand now

I understand that I must fend for this

and die for this

this is my own drama

this is my own series

this is my own love and heartbreak

I must be proud

what do I want to get even?

what do I want to suppress my anger?

It is not drowning into waters of my dreams

It is not getting saved by them either

It's ....

entering into an african sunset

coming through doors wooden with the ancient memories of my grandmothers approval

its wearing black and blue , bruised but cruised with industrial destiny

its thinking of God as your friend, as your only true love

you are doing this for heaven

for paradise

its breaking peoples voices by your silence

its believing in what you want

praying for it like you know

like you know

its a part of you

no matter what happens

always by your side

its waking up in the morning

and washing your face with african sunrise

for its the only remedy

_______________

When you touch a girl, you touch her soul