I never usually 14

If I let it unfold it will come to a place, a street, a memory, a seatbelt where i am held into position of this fantasy

locked within my happinness, my love ...

for as it enfolds

I enfold in to something I imagine, wondrous and livid with hope

I imagine the points of connection, temptation, truth and love

I imagine a dream enfolding

a life becoming

smiles, golden and silver with expensive driving

i imagine being driven

I imagine being loved

being driven to love

I imagine being his love

I imagine being his ...everything

his good everything and his bad

his wants and wishes

his driving

for he is driving me

as i let it enfold

I change

and I never usually change

but how can i let this go away?

as i see

and as i feel

and as something gets so close to me

so so close to me

i love the language it speaks out

even though i can't understand the detail

i love the language it makes and takes

of my understanding

its so easy to understand them

I want

to understand myself

and i never usually

but i am still mistaken

i am still lost

i am still not fulfilled

i am imbalanced

my feelings are catastrophically large

and so i must contain

i never usually contain

but this time

i must be

... contained within this drama forever

it all