Whats a Sudan

without its Sudanese having ran their mint teas still warm their washing still hung their cars still on the petrol lines for devestation as we knew it was always a part of our lives but we had hopeful yards that the sun was ours and the moonlight twinkled across the broken despair we had weddings to go to and new funerals but not the bloody kind. the iinds that were nurtured illnesses of maybe sudden dramas all within the confounds of our blessings whats a sudan without those busy bridges and annoying rakshas without the beautiful satins on hisy dirty streets on the backways of bahri, ladies from near and far for all the happy reasons being picky about shades of purples and blues asking the important questions - does this come in green? never having to ask how many of my family are left ? whats a Sudan without music good music bad music but music . on the streets barbers radios cars house yards televisios in the day and at night whatsa Sudan without the ways we knew the streets we lived in and the mess it was a mess explainable a mess organised who are we without our Sudan that feelimg you get when the plane lands or just when the electricity gets back or on thursday evenings driving on the nile or friday afternoons with your family eating mulah or having just left the kofeer or getting visitors or ramadan nights with the big table out or finding rare brands in shops i usedto adore or getting your hair braided or going to a fancy place i can only go in my memory now