Mind fog dimness bleakness and cloud

Am feeling lonely

Angry 

Messy 

Empty

Destructive

Lacking

Mean

Big with holes

Small with stupidness

Just all wrong

I feel

Really 

Alone

Always waiting for my phone to click

Always dreaming for the right thing in the wrong place

Always pushing back stress with more stress

Allaying filling my time with the wrong things

Golden time given to robbers

All hard work given to devils

All mistakesgiven back in return as guilt

As less sleep

As the present of being tired

Allah said

Be aware that you might love something that is bad for you

And that is it exactly

I won’t get asked on that 

I won’t be able to write on that 

I won’t be able to create on that 

I won’t be able to say anything in that 

That won’t save me

I feel

Very angry with myself

That I am so calm and can’t even walk 

I feel so silly with myself

I feel empty just empty 

Sleepy

Obsurd