untitled sadness

i've never been like this before
so low
so weak
so out of sync
like a broken programme
like a rusted piece of disused machinery
dying in a forgotten scrap yard in the middle of nowhere
unheard by noone
unknown to no one

Ive never been so out of line
so out of rythym
I dont even know who I am
no more
I dont even know who I am\\

Ive never felt so misunderstood
by myself
like im talking to myself in a foreign language
like ive moved into a new place i dont even know how i got to it


Ive never been so ill focused
nothing mtters to me anymore
i dont want anything anymore
i dont want to be anybody
I dont want to know anything

just my dreams and my fantasies

Ive never been so out of reality
like everything is somwhere moving on and
I am here somewhere else

Ive never been like this before
mad?
maybe
uncorrected
wild
avatar like

when i close my eyes i become the story that is exciting that is alive
but im still not the woman i want to be

ive never been like this before

ever