Sunday, August 8, 2010

Under the Ground _ is your Buried Life

'' But often, in the world's most crowded streets,
But often, in the din of strife,
There rises an unspeakable desire
After the knowledge of our buried life;
A thirst to spend our fire and restless force
In tracking out our true, original course;
A longing to inquire
Into the mystery of this heart which beats
So wild, so deep in us--to know
Whence our lives come and where they go.''
In our continuous loud struggle - Din of strife

Friday, August 6, 2010

DO YOU HEAR ME HOPE?

THREE EASY STEPS


YOU HAVE TO STOP DOING THE SIN

YOU HAVE TO FEEL BAD ABOUT IT

YOU HAVE TO MAKE A PROMISE NEVER TO DO IT AGAIN






AND IF YOU DO???

THEN YOU REPENT

AND IF YOU STILL DO?

THEN YOU REPENT AGAIN?

IF YOU DO IT AGAIN??


YOU REPENT AGAIN AND AGAIN

AND IF YOU STILL FALL SHORT ON YOUR PROMISE TO GOD?


THEN YOU REPENT, AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN


WE ARE ALL SINNERS,IT IS IN HUMAN NATURE TO SIN
i SIN
YOU SIN
WE SIN

A VERB COMMITTED TO OUR GENETIC STRUCTURE

yOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT MY SIN IS
AND I DO NOT KNOW WHAT YOUR SIN IS


BUT GOD KNOWS THE EXACT DETAILS OF SINS


SO DONT HIDE
DONT LIVE YOUR LIFE PRETENDING
THAT IF YOU CANNOT STOP SINNING
THEN YOU CANNOT CHANGE

WE ALL SIN

BUT WE CANNOT ALL REPENT

SO ASK GOD FOR FORGIVENESS
DO NOT HIDE
DO NOT BE A LOSER
REPENT
AND REPENT
AND REPENT


AND HE WILL ACCEPT
HE ALWAYS DOES


DONOT ENTER RAMADAN NOT BELIEVING THAT


DO YOU HEAR ME HOPE?

Monday, August 2, 2010

A new discovery_ The Truth is in the Past


9th CENTURY _ ALKINDI




'' It is fitting for us, NOT to be ashamed


of acknowledging truth


and to assimilate it,


from whatever source it comes to us


There is NOTHING of higher value than truth itself


it NEVER cheapens or abases he who seeks''
I wonder, I wonder
will writing how I feel witout ever seeing it ...work
it would be like writing in space and imagining the letters dissappear into alternate realities
maybe even travelling to some other planet
forming into their meaning
so If I wrote about true love
as the words miraged through the air
they would become love
or if I wrote about a dream
the dream would enfold
or if I wrote about a fear
the fear I would have
......
if i wrote words and didnt see them
never heard them
just wrote them
and thought about other things
like space and galaxies
and heaven
and the past
if I thought about the past and the people in it
I was on a path
and my words were on their own journey
I wouldnt have to feel them
I wouldnt have to control them
I think that would be fair
for words are crucial to pain
as they are to love
as they are to episodes of fury
as they are to knowledge
as
they
are
to
me

What it is...

I see Life like a rose in the ice... beautiful but with cold settings - There are so many incredible things out there - but we always need to fight and perservere against the hardships too... otherwise the cold will win ... and we will wither away.

My imagination has led me to believe in something called 'Sudan Fairytale' -
The fantasy that My country will one day be independant and proud, never selfsish to provide its people with its needs, give freedom and success to all, be forever committed to achieve a prosperous inhabitance to every Sudanese in their own country-

My eyes fail me and I see the truth which I call - 'Khartoum Heartbreak' - This is a theme running through the blog under the 'Khartoum Heartbreak' Poems and whatever else about Sudan conveying broken down love, poor streets and cut off electricity along with a lot of other decays and problems in Khartoum city Life.

But I love my country and so I have no choice but to merge the Pain and the Love as one.

Faith is my heart and I could never do without it hoping in my prayers that I can be someone better always and that God forgives me as I fall in Mistakes through that frozen path of Life...

Sometimes I feel under control with all the too many emotions that run to colour my days and nights - Books, movies, music, dreams, friends, family, strangers, travel, - reality - the 10 O' Clock news -Most of the time I'm very Lost in trying to understand - whatever happens becomes tangled into writing this confusing memoir -

It's a really odd combination of air - not sure whether it is refreshing or suffocating - stabilising or maddening - But I breathe and
so it is
'Memoirs of a Sudanese breath' as I am 'Lost but under control' -